From the Bleachers: It's Personal, It's Perspective

Most weekends, you'll find me in the bleachers. I'm not just cheering on my own kids but a whole team of them—some I know by name, others only by their jersey numbers. It's a village of parents, grandparents, and siblings showing up, supporting youth on the court. And while youth sports are often a hotbed of criticism, there's so much more unfolding from those bleacher seats.

During the week, I wear a different hat—a leadership role that sometimes feels more like firefighting, putting out emotional, logistical, and organizational blazes. There's a phrase I often use, one I should probably tattoo on my arm: "It's not personal, it's perspective." I say it to teachers, clients, and even myself. But lately, I'm realizing it's both.

From the bleachers, it's personal and it's perspective. We're watching kids pour themselves into a game, learning how to win, lose, and get better. But not all lessons are good ones. Last weekend, one player stood out—for all the wrong reasons. His game was rough, overly aggressive, and encouraged by a parent from the stands. When I finally spoke up to the ref, the child turned and cursed at me. It was a moment.

But I didn't speak from anger; I spoke from experience. As parents and coaches, we have a responsibility to guide, correct, and mentor. After the game, I approached the coach, not with judgment, but with concern. I told him, "You have this kid's trust. You see his potential. But all people saw today was how dirty he played. His skill was completely overshadowed."

As adults, we have hindsight. We know what it means to ruin your reputation with one bad choice. We know the pain of learning a hard lesson too late. So why not pass on those insights now? Why not teach kids that emotional, mental, and physical health matters just as much as the scoreboard?

Parenting isn't easy. Coaching isn't easy. And there is no perfect way to do either. But one thing we can all agree on? Our kids are watching. So let's show them how to lead with grace, grit, and growth.