Holding the Line: A Parent’s Reflection on Accountability

Holding the line is no easy feat.

As a parent and life coach, I hear stories every day—something happened at school, at home, with a friend. And often, people ask, What would you do? But honestly, there’s rarely a clear-cut answer. What’s right for my child may not be what’s right for their child, or for the situation at hand. Parenting isn’t one-size-fits-all. It’s layered. It’s nuanced. And it’s exhausting.

Lately, I’ve been feeling a sense of burnout—not from the volume of parenting challenges, but from the growing pattern I see: a lack of accountability. I absolutely believe in standing up for our kids when an adult gets it wrong. But I struggle with where the line is between advocating for them and enabling behavior that doesn’t serve them.

Somewhere along the way, the waters got muddy. We started confusing support with rescue. Maybe we’ve parented so loudly that our kids stopped speaking up. Maybe we’ve unintentionally taught them that their voice doesn’t matter—or worse, that there’s no consequence for how they use it.

I wonder if we’ve become so focused on protecting our children from discomfort, mistakes, or natural consequences that we’ve forgotten the importance of holding the line. And when we don’t hold it, we invite entitlement in its place.

Let me be clear: parenting is hard. It's full of gray areas, constant second-guessing, and moments when none of it makes sense. But one thing I do know is that bending to the point of breaking isn’t sustainable. For me, or for my child.

I want my children to learn that when they make a mistake—and they will—they need to step up, own it, and face the outcome. That’s life. That’s how I lead in my own work. I make mistakes all the time, and I try my best to own them. Because how can I expect to guide others if I don’t model what it looks like to be accountable?

At the end of the day, I don’t have all the answers. I’m just another parent navigating the same messiness everyone else is. But I do know this: in my home, I will continue to hold the line. That’s my job. Not the school’s, not the friend group’s, not society’s.

Mine.

Because I believe accountability and responsibility are two of the most important gifts we can give our children. And it starts with us.